Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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