God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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