cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize