did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize
