worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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