we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
