I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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