I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
