I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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