Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
