yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
