help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
I'm drive I can fine osifer
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
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