the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole