Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Randomize
