I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
