when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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