A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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