Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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