I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
