note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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