Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Randomize