i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
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