p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
