my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize