He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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