Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
i came on her dog
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
