i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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