I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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