I'm going to jail i love you
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
