I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
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I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
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He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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