Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Randomize
