yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
