This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
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As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
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Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize