i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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