Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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