I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize