ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Randomize
