He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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