he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Randomize
