i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Randomize