Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize