Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(312): View more from Illinois

I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?

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(312): I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night? http://tfl.nu/ityh

Replies (2) Good night (664) Bad night (1513)
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(310): View more from California

Swine flu. Run for my life!

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(310) Swine flu. Run for my life! http://tfl.nu/6pt3

Replies (3) Good night (895) Bad night (655)
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(315): View more from New York

Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.

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(315): Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever. http://tfl.nu/us8u

Replies (26) Good night (957) Bad night (5131)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?

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(978): is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl? http://tfl.nu/dwko

Replies (47) Good night (5657) Bad night (930)
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(571): View more from Virginia

how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......

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(571): how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days...... http://tfl.nu/e1u4

Replies (10) Good night (3602) Bad night (1763)
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(601): View more from Mississippi

He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.

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(601): He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows. http://tfl.nu/pp93

Replies (15) Good night (7096) Bad night (2128)
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(303): View more from Colorado

we're about an hour out, how's the weather?

(720): View more from Colorado

cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.

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(303): we're about an hour out, how's the weather? (720): cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home. http://tfl.nu/na0o

Replies (14) Good night (6208) Bad night (1226)
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(678): View more from Georgia

i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend

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(678): i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend http://tfl.nu/xiia

Replies (7) Good night (3785) Bad night (1219)
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(781): View more from Massachusetts

He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.

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(781): He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory. http://tfl.nu/fp19

Replies (6) Good night (869) Bad night (1918)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?

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(201): Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend? http://tfl.nu/zwy0

Replies (9) Good night (2774) Bad night (721)
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(647): View more from Ontario

Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.

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(647): Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg. http://tfl.nu/wi3n

Replies (1) Good night (1444) Bad night (602)
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(315): View more from New York

she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker

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(315): she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker http://tfl.nu/ddqo

Replies (3) Good night (403) Bad night (818)
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(970): View more from Colorado

I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.

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(970): I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table. http://tfl.nu/6me0

Replies (2) Good night (961) Bad night (216)
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(760): View more from California

He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.

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(760): He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted. http://tfl.nu/b6x4

Replies (2) Good night (500) Bad night (232)
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(614): View more from Ohio

You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground

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(614): You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground http://tfl.nu/3sd1

Replies (1) Good night (451) Bad night (149)

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