Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (424): View more from California

  I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (424): I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed http://tfl.nu/t74f
  Replies (9) Good night (5125) Bad night (1264)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier. http://tfl.nu/rjab
  Replies (81) Good night (8432) Bad night (835)
• Favorite

  (870): View more from Arkansas

  I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (870): I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance.. http://tfl.nu/o07j
  Replies (9) Good night (4695) Bad night (689)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  should I fuck that poor girl

  (1-770): View more from Georgia

  no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): should I fuck that poor girl (1-770): no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion http://tfl.nu/i8cj
  Replies (30) Good night (911) Bad night (4946)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold http://tfl.nu/axfw
  Replies (24) Good night (6469) Bad night (865)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome http://tfl.nu/nq8y
  Replies (13) Good night (4954) Bad night (1003)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life http://tfl.nu/k5dc
  Replies (13) Good night (4613) Bad night (1188)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go. http://tfl.nu/hus5
  Replies (10) Good night (2369) Bad night (753)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (715): tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder. http://tfl.nu/8ixi
  Replies (6) Good night (965) Bad night (1396)
• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (909): We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic. http://tfl.nu/24xb
  Replies (2) Good night (1159) Bad night (619)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume http://tfl.nu/d1bc
  Replies (4) Good night (948) Bad night (1058)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (734): In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups. http://tfl.nu/3nhq
  Replies (7) Good night (1410) Bad night (466)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis. http://tfl.nu/x9yx
  Replies (4) Good night (1002) Bad night (681)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress http://tfl.nu/kmvd
  Replies (6) Good night (1456) Bad night (451)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (573): I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high. http://tfl.nu/uvaf
  Replies (1) Good night (486) Bad night (264)

Randomize