You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
