Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(818): View more from California

i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick

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(513): View more from Ohio

I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.

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(416): View more from Toronto

I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.

(905): View more from Ontario

Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.

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(803): View more from South Carolina

He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(510): View more from California

she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong

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(313): View more from Michigan

Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.

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(785): View more from Kansas

When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.

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(802): View more from Vermont

You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.

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(706): View more from Georgia

i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.

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