Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize