Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I just pynch a tree in the face
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
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