Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
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