I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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