Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize