Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
