brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
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Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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