There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Randomize
